The Tooth Hurts !
Hello Everyone !
~ Welcome To Daniel’s Critical Corner ~
Even Dick Clark Says:
You Aught to Be in Pictures !
Happy New Year, one and all !!! It is hard to believe that just ten years
ago we partied like it was 1999. Those were simpler times. Sigh… Goin’
to the movies was such a nice treat… No cell phones, popcorn was still
under $10.00, Tom Hanks had a career and “Terminator Salvation” didn’t
exist !
Christian Bale’s high-tech flop aside, we sure had darn good reasons for
braving the lines at our local cineplex… 2009 has capped off a thrilling
decade of film that proved its resilience in an ever-turbulent world.
Yes, despite Janet Jackson’s boob falling out at the Superbowl, movies
were still there. Remember when we discovered that McDonald’s made
us fat ? Our escapism made us feel thin ! Going to see “Sex and the
City” eased the pain… (Even though we cried silently in the darkened
theater with traces of “Big Mac” still on our whiskers).
When Michael Phelps was getting stoned, we were getting high on life !
(Well, vicariously through film at any rate). Now, I give you the best of
the best, screw the rest. Let’s start with the most titillating tales from
this past year !!! Nope, I’m not talking about Balloon Boy or Madonna’s
tryst with Jesus.
Ladies and Germs, I proudly present the greatest flicks to grace 2009.
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The Blind Side
An eye-opening experience !
Erin Brockovich, Eat Your Heart Out !
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Away We Go
Bohemians can be wonderful (when they aren’t singing) !
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Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
AKA “Harry Potter and the Nursing Home of Incontinence”.
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Up in the Air
Hmm… Sounds like a description of Tiger Woods’ Career !
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My Bloody Valentine 3D
A personal favorite of mine.
Yet Another Great Pick !
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Inglourious Basterds
A hit on Hitler.
* Is my spell-checker working ?
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The Hurt Locker
This film is no dud !
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Star Trek
I really spaced out for a moment…
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Up
Ed Asner in 3D… Finally !!!
* They must’ve got my letters.
Ha Ha ! Now I Know Why They Call You An Old Fart !
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Avatar
True blue entertainment !!!
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That concludes my top ten !
~ Hold your applause. Let’s take a gander at 2009’s honorable mentions:
Ponyo ~
~ Confessions of a Shopaholic
9 ~
~ Earth
The Proposal ~
~ Michael Jackson’s This Is It
Paranormal Activity ~
~ The Hangover
Orson Welles and Me ~
~ District 9
Transformers: Revenge of
the Fallen ~
~ Precious
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Now what you’ve all been waiting for… The Stinker of the Year:
The envelope please… OK, the award goes to… “Bright Star” ! It
should have been called “Tarnished Turd”. LAME costume drama.
Avoid such crap at all costs !!!
Dishonorable Mentions:
~ Friday the 13th
Observe and Report ~
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Ah, now for the BIG payoff. You’ve hung on this far, so I shall treat
you to a fun list featuring 25 of my favorite movies from the 2000’s.
Good times… Savor the flavor !
Yep, Looks Like This Guy Has Nailed It Once More !!!
The Simpsons Movie
Kill Bill: Volume 1
Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
Finding Nemo
300
Elizabeth: The Golden Age
Spirited Away
Iron Man
Million Dollar Baby
Gosford Park
Pan’s Labyrinth
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Strangers With Candy
The Dark Knight
Elvira’s Haunted Hills
Meet the Parents
Winged Migration
Pirates of the Caribbean
Serenity
There Will Be Blood
Spider-Man 2
Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones
Frailty
O Brother, Where Art Thou?
The Bourne Ultimatum
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Phew ! Seems like I’ve turned Baby New Year on his ear with this page.
But I am resolved in 2010 to offend your grandmother to dish out some
more great reviews on relevant movies !!! Thanks for reading !!!
~ ~ ~
Daniel’s Critical Corner: Always a “10” out of “10” !
Great movies, all of them. And quite a few that I still have to see! I might just go buy “The Hurt Locker” because I haven’t seen it yet and everyone RAVES about it. Probably gonna get an Oscar…
Top 25 of the 2000’s?!? Damn…wish I had thought of that…
Great stuff Daniel!
Thanks Alan !!! You are right… “The Hurt Locker” has “Oscar” written all over it.
I’d love to know what your favorites were from the 2000’s. I hope you do a list !
How fun! I agree with quite a few of them..but my WORST turd…lol. would be ‘Observe and Report.’ My faves of the year are Star Trek and Avatar 🙂
I would have liked to see some of these movies reviewed by you 🙂
“Observe and Report” was just awful. Halfway through I was asking myself,
“Am I really supposed to be laughing at this ?” We have a pitiful character
succumbing to stalking, drug use, mental illness and violence… Not a great
scene.
It actually made “Paul Blart: Mall Cop” look like a comedic masterpiece !!!
Really great list and as usual incredibly entertaining. I’m happy to see you weren’t afraid to add Harry Potter in your list of great movies this year. I feel like it’s been terribly overlooked and was one of the better additions to the series. Yates has really turned the series around. I was scared after Goblet Of Fire and hoping it still had life in it.
And also big props for putting Attack Of The Clones on there. Phantom Menace may have been a hiccup critically (I still liked it-you can check my review, I’m not afraid to say it!), but I felt Attack of The Clones and Revenge of the Sith ultimately redeemed the new series. Haters can suck it! 🙂
Aw, thanks Heather ! You and I often look at movies from the same angle !
“Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince” is a remarkable film, as part of the
series (or unto itself).
The newer “Star Wars” trilogy was a hoot on many levels. Anybody saying
otherwise is full of Bantha Poodoo !!! Have you heard what Christoper Lee
is up to these days ?! He has lent his voice to a “metal” concept album of
sorts… Go on with your bad self, Count Dooku !
good list Daniel ! (Happy 2010!)
Of course I put Trek up High on that list! lol I haven’t seen Blind Side yet but I hope to. Proves good movies can be made by just telling a story with good actors!
Wow and Harry made the cut!! woohoo!
since Trek came out I saw it twice in the theaters and now have the dvd and watched it 3 more times.. it keeps getting better.. I am depressed they don’t have a script yet for a next movie :o(
“Star Trek” was just plain awesome. It met (and exceeded) our lofty
expectations !!! LOL !!! I’ve played my copy to a frazzle at this point.
I have read that the still unscripted “Trek” sequel won’t be out until
June of 2012. I don’t want them to rush things, but that’s ridiculous.
Perhaps they are hoping that Zachary Quinto can take over as “Old”
Spock ?
Or maybe they are hoping William Shatner will expire so no one really
has to worry about giving him a cameo !!!
ouch! I’m betting they had to sign to do more then one movie of trek IF they decided to do them.. but 3 years for another script is ridiculous.. look how long they waited for “a good Indian jones script”..and it was NOT good ! (though harrison can do no wrong so don’t even touch that statement Daniel!)..
I know it takes a year to make the movie and edit it etc but it sure doesn’t take 2 yrs to write a script!!! ARGH!!!! I want them back sooner.. I don’t want to have to use a walker to get to the dang movie!
I’m sure you are looking forward to “Extraordinary Measures”, the new Harrison Ford flick
due out next week !!! Hey… I liked “Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” !!! They say that there
may be a fifth “Indiana Jones” film in the mix ! Ford says he’s happy to oblige (as long as
the sequel “didn’t take another 20 years to digest”).
oh yes, i am looking forward to Fords new movie!..
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh I didn’t know he said he’d be willing to do another Indy!! I thought sure that last movie was “passing it on should there be another”..
I didn’t “dislike” Crystal Skull.. I just wasn’t as happy as other times.. too much was taken away from “Indy”..
What an eclectic list! Avatar, UP, and Star Trek were probably my three faves this year. I’m also disappointed that the next Trek movie won’t be out until 2012, why wait so long?!!! At this rate they’ll get MAYBE three movies total out of that cast… oh well.
Waiting too long for the “right script” can spell curtains for some franchises !!!
“Spider-Man 4” has just been exterminated, and “Pirates of the Caribbean: On
Stranger Tides” was almost set adrift.
You’re nominated! Head to my blog to find out more…
Thanks Katie ! Happy New Year ! I’ve got to start writing my acceptance speech…
Your list was great!! I loved My Bloody Valentine. My fav is Avatar. Beautiful all around!!! I always enjoy reading your reviews!!
Thanks Dawn !!! And Happy New Year !!! 🙂
“My Bloody Valentine 3D” was killer !!! It managed to blend
old school horror with new technology in an innovative way.