Back In Black
Hello Everyone !
~ Welcome to Daniel’s Critical Corner ~
Suiting Up Today: Marvel’s The Avengers
Fanboys around the world, it is time to rejoice ! Nerds, bask in the glory !
Geeks, dust off those action figures ! “Marvel’s The Avengers” has arrived.
More rewarding than Free Comic Book Day, and shinier than unobtainium !
This film is incredible… A surefire SMASH ! Yes, those were some blatant
“Hulk” references !!!
Indeed, a multitude of people were holding their breath (until they turned
green) while anticipating our gathering of superheroes. Samuel L. Jackson
has been dangled in everybody’s face for four years, promising us amazing
things. Usually, Mr. Jackson does not like to be dangled !
He’s made appearances in “Iron Man”, “Thor” (and even “Captain America:
The First Avenger”). Jackson’s always rambling on about something called
The Avenger Initiative. He peddles that idea as if he were selling “Amway”
or “Avon”. And, if his plans tanked, selling makeup would probably be his
next career move.
Anyway, Jackson stars as “Odin”, the ruler of Asgard (and Thor’s father) !!!
He is also the father of… Whoops ! Wait a second. Anthony Hopkins plays
Thor’s dad… It’s that darn eyepatch that mixes me up each time. Jackson
portrays “Nick Furry”… I mean “Fury” ! He’s not “Furry”, the man is bald !
But that is neither hair nor there. Nick Fury is the director of the Strategic
Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division ! They just call
it “S.H.I.E.L.D.” for short. This triumph of an action flick actually starts off
rather low-key (or, should I say, “Loki”) as Fury encounters a bad guy who
wants to steal his magic ice cube.
Loki (Thor’s evil bro) has dropped in to get his hands on that glowing blue
square known as “The Tesseract” ! Tom Hiddleston plays Loki (who is loco
in the cabeza). But, his cabeza is well adorned with a killer helmet ! Fury
gets blindsided (pun intended) and his powerful thingy falls right into the
clutches of dastardly (if not impeccably dressed) villains.
How does one combat such treachery and high fashion !? Find just a few
haute couture costumed-crusaders of your own, of course !
I Was Told They Would Make Me A Star.
As good fortune would have it, Fury has several colorful characters on speed
dial. “Speed” being a key word, because these folks can run (and fly) pretty
fast !!! There’s “Charlie Chaplin” (played by Robert Downey Jr.) also known
as “Iron Man”. He doubles as “Sherlock Holmes” on occasion, so this is one
busy fellow. Joining Holmes is “Captain America” (Chris Evans).
Captain America has been thrust into the future. An odd world that’s given
him the red, white and blues. He was a boogie woogie bugle boy, but after
dozing off for almost 70 years he does not feel like tootin’ his own horn ! If
nothing else, this guy needs to feel useful in today’s society.
After all, the man was actually frozen for decades. Good thing. Otherwise,
Mickey Rooney would have been hired to portray him. Captain America was
a puny weakling at one point in his life (until the U.S. military experimented
on him with a bizarre strength serum). Now, he is one tough cookie !!!
Weaving her way into this growing group of goody-goodies is the lovely and
alluring “Black Widow”. Scarlett Johansson puts an interesting spin on the
iconic spy. As “Natasha Romanoff”, she’s Russian to find every dangerous
criminal. Widow is only armed with martial arts, a tiny gun and some dude
(who channels Daniel Craig) whilst shooting arrows !
To keep environmentalists off their back, the group promises to go green…
Naturally, they enlist the “Hulk” !!! I think because he recycles !? Anyway,
the jolly green giant is (once again) voiced by Lou Ferrigno. As for the guy
who plays his moody alter ego, “Bruce Banner”, we now have Mark Ruffalo.
Edward Norton was perfect in 2008 (these days, he’s just 2000 and late) !
Eric Bana was good too, but Ruffalo nails it.
I Just Don’t Know Who I Am Anymore !
The Hulk almost steals the show. Everyone gets plenty of quality face time,
but (much to my surprise) Hulk just plain rocks !!! To round out this heroic
posse, is yet another name on the roster. While flying in their craft, several
members of our gallant gang think they hit a bird during a lightning storm !
Nope. They’ve smacked into the god of thunder. And boy, is he “Thor” !!!
Thor (Chris Hemsworth) swings his hammer to save the day (only because
he can’t find his baseball bat) ! Backing up this stellar star and his cohorts
are “Agent Phil Coulson” (Clark Gregg), Iron Man’s computerized assistant
“J.A.R.V.I.S.” (Paul Bettany) and Iron Man’s seemingly always barefoot love
interest “Pepper Potts” (Gwyneth Paltrow). “Hawkeye” (Jeremy Renner) is
Natasha Romanoff’s exceptional archer.
Even Sir Michael Caine has returned, playing the noble manservant, “Alfred
Pennyworth”. He’s always putting in his two cents ! Ha !!! Um… Whoops,
wrong movie (heck, wrong universe) ! I’m already starting to get multiple
angry phone calls. Sheesh. Good thing I didn’t ask why “Wonder Woman”
wasn’t in this extravaganza.
It has been said that too many cooks spoil the broth. Not the case here !!!
Each superhero brings something unique to the mix (and everything blends
harmoniously). Sure, there are HUGE egos to contend with, and there are
plenty of grand fights amongst The Avengers themselves. They do resolve
their issues (sometimes by duking it out) and that is half the fun !
Collectively, these warriors are able to thwart Loki’s fiendish plot. Loki and
some random “Other” guy are planning on ruling mankind !!! The second
dude’s name is indeed “The Other”, just for the record ! The Avengers are
shocked when a huge orifice opens up in the sky and nasty creatures start
flying out… Very similar to Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way” video !
This flick’s graphics are nothing short of dazzling ! The audience is treated
to eye-popping special effects. Hmm… That might explain what happened
with Thor’s father and Nick Fury ! Solid performances, dynamic chemistry
between the actors (and director Joss Whedon’s sense of humor) made it
all very much worth the wait.
So, start Romanoff towards the theater to see “Marvel’s The Avengers” !
Would I Recommend This ? Yes
Daniel’s Critical Rating: 10 out of 10
~ ~ ~
Daniel! This is an AWESOME review. Very witty and full of fun! I very much enjoyed reading it and your enthusiasm for this film! I LOVED The Avengers and also gave it the coveted perfect score! Well done.
Thank you so much ! “The Avengers” will certainly be an influence to the superhero film genre (in many positive and exciting ways) !
Nice puns lol… 😀
Thanks ! It was great fun assembling those high-flying puns !!!
ahh glad to read so much about the Hulk! First off I helped Lou at a few autograph shows and I just adore him. “Gentle Giant” only begins to speak of him. I love Edward Norton and Ruffalo.. well, he’s just plain gorgeous! (and talented)..yeah yeah, as OLD MEN like to say I am freeking old..NOT BLIND! And what’s not to like about Robert Downey Jr? I really have liked his talent since Charlie Chaplin. I hate that I rarely get to a movie..but I do try to buy the movie asap. I’m not sure why I have to own movies.. I own Avatar and Star Trek and recently both have been on FX on tv and I keep watching them over and over with commercials!.. see, Daniel.. this is what you have to look forward to when you grow old!
I saw Lou in person last year (at a comic book convention here in Albuquerque) but I didn’t have a chance to speak with him.
I’m always watching films on TV that I already own on DVD or Blu-ray, so you are not alone there ! Ha-ha ! 🙂
For a second there I thought you were going to entirely recap the Thor storyline, just mixing it up with Avengers actors. Which would have been awesome.